False Starts

If I had a dollar for every time I had an idea for a project that never got started I would be right up there with Bill Gates.  Yea... that many.

The funny thing is not matter how much I flesh it out in my mind, write a summary, put together a business plan it ALWAYS ends up the same.  I stop.

I wish I had a good excuse but I really don't.  Most of the time I lose interest or I decide maybe this isn't what I really want.  My favorite is I don't see a clear path to monetize this.

You see... I'm not looking to be some big hot shot millionaire.  I actually enjoy working in an office and interacting with other people.  BUT I would love to pay off my student debt and pay off my house and have some time to travel.  Also to retire comfortably,... I don't want a big fancy house, although I do have a nice house now.

I have absorbed so much content from all the experts out there I am in a constant state of "analysis paralysis".

I figure one of these days I'll find the right project.  When I do I am positive I have the skills to get it done.

Now... What is that ONE thing?

What Will Your Legacy Be? Your Life's Purpose

I've asked myself this question THOUSANDS of times...

What is my life's purpose?

I'm almost 50 and I think I may have figured it out.  It depends WHEN I asked the question and what was going on in my life.

Not too many people know this about me but at one time I had considered becoming a Catholic priest.

Those who know me are probably saying NO WAY!

Let's just say I didn't always have the best judgment in the world and I may or may not have let my fascination with women get the better of me.

So, when you are trying to get your bills paid and you can barely stay focused on the coming weekend the LAST thing you are thinking about is your legacy.

What will you leave behind that people will remember about you?  

There have been times where I felt that I was making more of an impact on other peoples life and other times not so much. 

I got married late in life and my wife and I at some point decided not to have children.

I don't regret that decision, however there goes any easy answer for the whole legacy thing.

What the heck can I do to leave this world just a tiny bit better then it would have been if I hadn't existed at all.

I can be there for my friends and family and try to make their lives a little easier or so they don't have to struggle as much.

Everyone struggles and I think its how we grow so you want to help people just enough.

Now I am trying to write.

Maybe my words will touch someone. Just maybe they will try whatever it is one more time.

Cause in the end it's all about getting up and trying again when we fail.  Learning just enough to try it a little differently.

By helping each other we all can learn and make our journey to the grave just a little bit more pleasant.

Day by day by day... 

The 2016 Election in a Nutshell...

So...  This year's election is off the rails so to speak.   Donald Trump has become the sole candidate for the Republican party.  The establishment is still in a state of pseudo denial.  I believe they will come around...In time.

What does this say about Republicans?

They have completely lost touch with their base.  The Tea Party and Fox News have been fanning the flames of conservatism. Why would that not bring about a candidate like Donald Trump?

You can't have it both ways...

You can't ride the wave of public anger over the failures of establishment politics and then freak out when people vote for an anti-establishment candidate.

Now before you try and throw Ted Cruz in the mix let me tell you how I feel about this guy.

Cruz he is a master of pandering politics and word on the street is a serious asshole...

Cruz should know you can't run for office as the guy to discombobulate the Fed.  What kind of candidate tries to get elected as president under the premise of hey, vote for me and I'll completely make it so the government has no power.

You think its not working now?  I wonder is someone told him you use the office of the president to lead the country.  Any nitwit can just go in and reverse EVERY executive order that Obama made.  That has greatest pandering effect to the haters.

I wonder if he realizes that by dismantling the government he will in effect diminish his own ability to lead?  Who does that?!

The Democrats are in a pickle as well... I'm not a fan of Hilary Clinton, yet she is the safe bet in my opinion.  If you like the way things are now then she is your candidate.

Her presidency, in my opinion, will offer little in the way Washington gets things done.  A vote for Hilary is a vote for the status quo.

The conservative media  would LOVE for her to be president.  All their copy will still work, just replace Obama with Hilary.  They will have no problem whatsoever attacking her because she is a woman.  Its pretty common knowledge that conservatives don't dig on strong women.

And Bernie...  I won't lie, his message resonates with me.  He is trying to change things. But and its a big BUT; I don't think this country is ready for ANY candidate that even hints at a flavor of socialism.

Fanboys such as myself think of the GOOD kind of socialism... Socialism that leads to Star Fleet and the exploration of space.  

In what I call the real world I believe SOME socialist systems could help even out the playing field. But, yet if we don't set some sort of realistic boundaries we might end up like the abomination that is Venezuela.

Any way, I apologize if this post is somewhat scatter brained.  I'm a writer in process and I hope to develop my style in good time.

Keep The Faith!

Writing for a living

Sooooo...

I'm going to take a stab at this whole writing for money thing.

I've got the whole marketing thing down and I have been 'training' to become a writer for a couple of years now.  The funny part is I have READ about becoming a writer without actually writing.

I'm committed now, Hell or high water I will write.

You WILL buy something from me, I know it.

:)

So I'm a writer...

Today I decided to be a writer.

I don't have a paying job as a writer and I haven't started a novel or anything but I am proclaiming that as of today I write.

Not sure if I am particularly good at it but I am willing to give it a shot.

I hope to inspire with my words.

Tell people there is a better way.

Maybe my legacy will be to start a movement of rational thinking.

Using data to solve problems and to set our differences aside.

Maybe its a dream.

Maybe no one will care to listen.

I have to try.

It starts now.

Almost 50...

So I'm knocking on 50's door...

OK so I still have another year to go, still it feels like I am nearing the end of an era and starting a new.

I don't feel this old, yet here I am.  I have a lot of the same fears, hopes and dreams I had over 10 years ago yet I feel like I have been moving forward the whole time.

I guess life is about change, so as long as I got that going on I'm good.

Some days I feel nostalgic for the old days... Some days I'm thankful they've past.  And other days I'm like I should not still be sitting here trying to figure stuff out.

I do have these weird sort of feeling that things will be alright... I have been through tough times and good times and always emerged a better person.  That's about the sum of my life until now.

Que sera, sera...

-H